I am crazy

Richness

I am still awake 7:26 AM.

"You can be and get" Everything you want!

You Really Want to Know Yourself?

Ask yourself twice. No no ask yourself again. I am afraid you will be surprise. Long ago, when I was a little bit younger I have been asking and asked to and by myself and people the very same question. Every day I wake up in the morning and would look at my self in the mirror I would complain.

"Why am I not tall enough?"

"I don't like the shape of my nose!"

Then I would tell my self, "You are more than just your exterior!"

Who am I? A spiritual entity wrapped in a body that is perceived by virtue of the function of my and your eyes?

We all or most of us dared to fight their parents, break the rules, take drugs, wasted our youth. Only to justify our endeavor of getting a better acquaintance. with ourselves.

After all this time, I probably give up on the idea. Hmm rather, I decided to stop asking who I really am. Why? The more I asked the more I tried to put my self in boxes where labels of stereotypes are taped on their faces. Which labels do I belong to? This follows with our subconscious effort to comply to them. Our actions, the way we try to look and so on.

No No. It is deeper than that.

I don't want to know the real me!

Probably I am an unraveled monster full of hatred and sarcasm. The one who is happy (secretly) to witness the failing of the non underdogs. Nevertheless hypocritically trying to console.

OMG. What if I am a real bad person?

yes yes.

I don't want to know my self. My real self.

Bye bye self. Please stay behind there. Yes right there! Behind the mirror. Do not crack up and escape from the mirror. Just stay there, you belong there.

Regards,

UHB (Unidentified Human Beings)

PS: At least from today.

What has Changed in My Life thus far?

Hmm since I started this blog, back in ??? February or March or somthing like that.

The very purpose is to implement whatever it is preached in the book the secret. The infamous: LAW OF ATTRACTION. Your Thoughts become Things!

Right.

Okay, I am not yet a millionaire, although I have been applying the law of attraction. Things that I did and which by the way I take a break for awhile from doing due to the immense amount of energy required to carry out the task are as follows:

1. Visualize

This is not so hard for me. Therefore I perceive this as the least that would consume effort. I would just close my eyes and think about all the great things that I have including piles of money. And well, so far........ I am still far from millions.

2. Feel Good

This is the hardest for me. Because, when reality checks in, most of the time it bites. Ha ha ha or stings. Thus to keep the positive feeling is the one which takes most of the effort.

3. Receive

Hmmm this is to me similar to visualizing.

Okay. perhaps, i should frequent and update this blog more often to remind my self of my ultimate goal.-----------> $$$

what about you? what is it that you have always wanted?

Get Ur ASS to Work!

Why is it so hard to get your ass to work?

By work I mean something that you have to complete because there is a deadline attached to it. Yes, that is it.

Personally, I hate deadlines. Why? Because it hinders me or rather deter me to be free in the method that I would choose to experiment to the completion of the work. For example, I may start on a report on say a laboratory experiment. Due to deadlines, I have not much freedom, at least, as far as time constraint is concerned. I have to do it according to certain methodologies or steps that had been done so that it hopefully can be completed on time. O well, when I am forced to use my left brain*, my right brain will start to demand more attention. The moment it feels the slightest abandonment, it will rebel and everything is becoming so difficult to pay attention. Right. That is exactly when I would go surf the net, probably start with YouTube. I would watch useless videos showcasing people talking about the weirdest possible stuffs with the least possible relevance. Following that, I would go and search for old movies which I can freely stream online. That is when I would end up watching movies like disney's, legally blondes, and so on. Before I realize it, it is already almost the next day's morning. I am screwed (again).

Greetings to Deadlines.

PS: I also take pics of my self when I am supposed to do my deadlines!!!

Uncertainty

How comfortable are you being in an uncertain situation?

I meant, what is an exactly certain situation anyway? Is there such a thing?

Personally, I know that it is not possible to escape uncertainty. It is the degree of uncertainty that varies. In some situations you may found it fairly uncertain while in some others severely uncertain.

I grew up in a highly religious society. Like many of such societies, God is the ultimate power by whom decision or outcome of anyone's life is decided. Therefore people believe that they do not have total control of their life, therefore their outcome. As there is always an "invisible" hand interfering with every body's life. Thus, gives rise to the notion that life is uncertain.

Do you believe that?

I believe that life is uncertain, not because I think God has a 100% intervention upon it. Not that I disbelieve the existence of the ultimate higher being. Although, I neither testify his/her/its very existence. I think life is uncertain simply because it has so many factors that may factor in an outcome of an event. Take for example, the occurrence of raining. There are a lot of things that determines the event of raining. Not only either it will or will not happen, also these things determine the intensity of the event, namely heavy or light. The amount of water vapor in the cloud, the temperature, the amount of water in the land, the level of pollution, or many other factors. Therefore, It is impossible to tell how it is going to be rain exactly.

Nevertheless, with the advancement of science, we are able to at least predict with a fair chance of being correct the possibility that it may rain. We know that if the amount of water vapor in the cloud reach a certain level, most likely it will rain. Or maybe other measurable quantities leading to the occurrence of the event.

Applying this analogy to our life, to our future, it is impossible to picture and exactly getting what we want. However, if we are doing the right things and making sure that we are doing them right, the predictability of the expected outcome can somehow be foreseen, just like how we forecast if tomorrow is going to rain.

Needs

We all have needs. We have needs therefore we exist.

Bali

I have always loved Bali. The beach, the blue sky, the little temple, the sunset.

Every body goes to Bali!

Back again

It has been a while, I know. I have sort of given up the thoughts of keeping an online journal. The main reason is, I don't think that anyone would ever bother to read it. O well, Human beings are weird. We go online, talk about our fears and insecurities, in the hope that someone might bother to read and probably leave a message. And the moment you learnt that you had a visitor and you would go, wow!

Anyway.

My life is back again with piles of school work and projects. Nothing much going on, except I have this great idea to start on a novel. Yes! a novel, a story that came out of nowhere during my half-awake day dreaming looking out the busy traffic in a Singapore main road.

In the time being, I came up with many characters who will mesh at some points in the novel.

Ah, I have also been preparing for my graduate school application.

wish me luck :)

I Was an Obese Kid

Not anymore. I had started to realize that it was not an attractive thing to be obese and that had been when I started to do something about it. And so I am not obese anymore.
I guess that is how I achieve.
I needed to be bothered enough to do something about it and then I do the necessary things.

Europe

Europe is like rainbow it has so many spectrum of color those which make it beautiful.

God

Where do we go after we die?This very question has been one of the driving force towards the many organizations wrapped in superstition. Religion. Spread successfully due to blind faith, submission to a superior power, or ignorant and delusional wishful thinking of the hereafter compensation after struggling lifetime.

As Karl Marx once said, Religion is the opium to the masses.

I have a belief that religion is not in the business of establishing the relationship between people and God. Whatever or whoever that maybe. Instead its ammunition of fear induction leads to guilt complexion has been its flagship tool to gain submission from human kind. The fear of the burning hell fire. The guilt of the original sin. A very avid kind of motivation to get people feared and submit to the religion which bring upon power to the interested party. Those in the religion business.

This epidemic has been highly contagious and deadly. Many young minds have been brainwashed. Many young bodies have been sacrificed in the name of different God. From different religion.

I am here not to question the existence of God. As it is a very private relationship, in my opinion, which should not be interfered by any gurus, imams or fathers. In fact one do not need to belong to any type of organization to make believe that God exists. In whatever form or way that person choose to believe. It is a personal affair!

Back to the question. Where do we go after we die? Are we to face penalties and punishment as retributions to our wrongdoings? Is God, if he exists, interested in getting back to us if we eat a certain kind of meat or if we are absent from fasting during certain special month? And why are there so many different rules written in many different books? Are there many different God? O wait I was told there is one true God. Wait a minute! The fellow religion must have told the same about their God. I want to make sure that I am right and they are wrong.

But. How?

If I can not even talk to God.Can you help me, uncle?

Makassar

Makassar is the capital of South Sulawesi, one of the many provinces situated in the Indonesian Archipelago. This is my third visit after the last visit last year. The temperature is extremely hot with very high humidity it is extremely easy to get sweaty. The city is low land with its sea shore as the main attraction especially at night with youbgsters in groups hanging out and unwinding with buddies at the Losari beach, the hippiest rendesvous in town. Typical for important cities in the country, Makassar being one of the very important trading port during the Dutch occupation it has a building whose architecture is built to function as fortress, fort of Rotterdam. Nowadays it is used as cultural centre of South Sulawesi and museum. Many youngsters of Makassar hang out around the building with big cameras to practice their photography skill which is apparently quite popular especially among the youngsters.
Makassar is a very multi-ethnic city, many people of different ethnic and cultural background blend and integrated into its very culturally-rich society. Nevertheless its unofficial segmented fragments of the city that cater to certain ethnical group in certain part of the city.
Food is a very important part of the pride of its people. No food from anywhere else may beat the appeal of the food of Makassar. Typical for South East Asian food, the food is usually spicy and fresh, also rice is the primary part of culinary with seafood as its compliment.

We are Human Being NOT Human Thinking

Napoleon Hill. Google him up and you will most probably stumble upon an ebook Think and Grow Rich. Pick it up and read it!

This book was written roughly a century ago by a man whose very vision and wisdom changed lives of many to the fab and greatness, abundance and richness. His very wisdom is scattered throughout the book that you may picked it up in the very beginning of your reading journey or take you till the very last page of the book. Just read it and be inspired.

Personally I have come across many many the alike references under the same subject and I must say this one is really the mother of origin that had given birth to many alike philosophies.

Parallel to reading it, I am also revisiting my other very very inspirational reading by Neale Walsch. Where it was written that we are creating our reality. And all that is happening is intended yet may not be anticipated. This means that all that we have intended manifested in this reality that we perceive and none of this intention is left unrealized. However the outcome of the manifestation may not be anticipated especially when there is no clarity of intention.

To think about it, we or most of us grow in the culture upholding beliefs such as good things does not come easy, good things do not last, dreams do not manifest and so on. We are creating reality or believe that forces us to think that life sucks and so on. Whilst the reality is we are creating the very reality that we live in. What we think is our reality is not the real reality. Now, it might get a little bit confusing. Basically, we need to stop to think or to analize rather we must start to being. Being with a problem and we will find the already available solution there is to be discovered.

Starting today Have Intention without prefering to it. Intend your path a certain way, intend the kind of achievement or goals you want to have without prefering to it. Do not think just intend and feel it. Be with your dreams and goals. Do not think cause when you think more you tend to urge yourself to find reasons or excuses that favor the opposite end of the result you desire.

Thinking is the slowest method of creation.

"It is when you just be with your problem, rather than keep thinking about it, that the greatest insight comes."

Have you not heard the truly great creators, the truly great problem solvers, say, when you give them a problem,...
"Hmm... let me be with it for a while."
A Genius does not create a solution, but finds the solution.

Awareness is a state of being.

You are living in the illusion, you have placed yourself there, so you should give it some thought. But remember, thought creates reality, so if you've created a reality that you don't like, don't give it a second thought.

PS: All written in italic are words quoted from Neale Donald Walsch book "Friendship with God"

How to Manifest Your Dreams?

1. Be Specific.

What do you want exactly? There are not one thing that you think that does not manifest. Be specific on your goal. When you want to achieve it and most importantly what exactly is it that you want to achieve. Be specific! Writes it down and break it down into points or perhaps action plans. For example, one year from now I will be moving to switzerland and start working there. That is my ultimate primary goal at the moment. In order to achieve that I need to make action plans such as VISA application and the likes.

2. Be Stubborn.

Yes. You gotta be stubborn or in other words hold on to your dreams faithfully no matter what. Do not be deceived by the pseudo physical or material limitation that might seem to hinder you. There is no such thing as limitation. Keep holding on to it, put your passion and mind to it. Focus on to your dreams. Talk about it with your family or (trustworthy) friends write about it, think about and dream about it. Live your dreams in your head before you live it in your reality. You will be surprised how resources just come to you and as if they all conspire to help you achieve your dreams.

3. Enjoy the Journey

Enjoy the process, or whatever that you have to go through to reach your final goal. Enjoy the ride, look around you, enjoy the process whilst firmly grasp your goal in your head and heart. There is nothing better than appreciating the journey of hard work, sweat and blood when it is done with passion and full heart.

4. Celebrate

Celebrate your success. It helps registering the very process and fundamental to your system that the next time you set your mind to something you will just be able to achieve it.

Paris. I

Outliers:The Opportunity (Part II)

Okay, presumably from the title of this posting, it is to be understood that this is a continuation from the previous posting of the Outliers posting:The Opportunity. We, now, understood that the succesful outliers do not primarily depend on one's individual innate talent in excelling or achieving mastery yet rather a result of "opportunity" which led these individuals cultivating hours and hours of hardwork and practice in sharpening paricular skills, 10,000 hours.

What implication does it have to us?

The most obvious one would be the way we would perceive outliers. Perhaps no longer do we fall un to false admiration to these outliers as such perceiving God plays unfair rule by inseminating more gifts un to some people but not others. Rather, we appreciate the hardwork and time spent in carving such a exceptional skills in these outliers.

Now, if we look at the number of hours put 10,000 hours, it is natural to think that such dedication is not possesed by Tom, Dick and Harry. 10,000 hours of practice that spans through out one sixth, on average, of one's lifetime if the average age is to be taken as sixty and if it is assumed that each year one-thousand hours are invested in developing one particular talent. It involves unconditional dedication that demands nothing in return. A pure devotion of self-indulgence into practices and learnings. Such situation only possible when the person is devoting himself entirely like when one is in love. Total devotion translates to hours and hours of practices and learnings.

Switzerland, Tschüss !

One last day. In less than 24 hours I will be flying back home to my very home continent Asia. Finally I have wrapped my 22-week of Industrial Attachment in Switzerland and soon will have to say goodbye to Switzerland and Europe. It has been a wonderful six month of working and playing, of self discovery and soul search.

Surviving one of the worst winter in 10 years in Europe to rushing finish the project in the laboratory, to falling in love and having sold a painting. They have all made a memorable entry to my mental diary.

I will be back as a different person who would cherish happy moments who would be grateful for loving people and who would try to live in the present. Switzerland has been my second home in the last six months. Perhaps, it will be my home in the future.

Outliers:The Opportunity (Part I)

Outliers. Recap: The odd ones out of the success that are not able to be explained. The millionaires, the nobel prize winners, the high achievers. The Outliers.

It is not a question that some are born to do certain things in life. Da Vinci to paint masterpieces, Mozart with his scores, and many other whose names carved in the history of mankind, whose appearance not so frequent as to documented in greatest books of all time.

However, A further study or investigation made by Malcolm in his book made it clear that there are many other factors en route someone to achieving what he gotta achieve. Here how he built his arguments in his book.

This part of the book started with analysis of the Canadian Ice Hockey League players. These players are among the best in the country whose very destiny (seems to) was to play ice hockey. These are the most agile, the most efficient players in the field. Apperently (without rocket science) most of the players are born in January, February and March. Looking at players from previous league the author, as well, found consistency in the month of birth of the players. Starting with this seems to be peculiarity he then realized that the cutoff date of the players recruitment is January 21. This means the boy who was born after January 21 in a particular year will be put in the same class to those born before January 21 the year after. This gives advantage to those who born in January, February and March as they have matured (10 months gap in age can make huge difference in physical maturity during puberty) compared to their younger counterparts. This advantage translates in a better performance in game, better attitude in the field which lead to better qualification, special care i.e more training and so on. Simply put, this °age° advantage leads this January, February and March born players to the more exposure in the field, more opportunity to play and practice, more attention from the coaches and thus shaping them to being better players.

From the previous paragraph it seems that it all boils down to how much time and effort was to give these outliers the extra edge of opportunity shaping them to become what they are. It takes 10,000 hours of practice, exercising and DEDICATION to build maestros and connoisseurs of this world. The author was studying a class of students studying to play violin. These violinists-to-be are then classified in three categories in terms of skills. The first class, the Maestro, are those to play with the best orchestra followed by the second and third. When interviewed, everyone in the first class notably spent the most hours in practicing their violin playing skills. None of those in this first class seems to have that "magic" that somehow just inherited. They have the same share of hours of practice. 10,000 hours. Malcolm then started talking about the Beatles who had theirs, their 10,000 hours. When they were invited to play in a night club in Hamburg where they were given the opportunity to play 7 days a week for long long hours. They had played their 10,000 hours as well before they are the Beatles. Or Bill Gates or Bill Joy (one of the greatest computer engineer genius whose codes are used in internet) or Steve Jobs. These people are lucky enough in getting or making their opportunity in having their 10,000 hours in shaping, sharpening their very skill that lead them to their mastery.

Now, if it is clear to us that it takes 10,000 hours in making our mastery which perhaps will take 10 years or so if in each year we dedicate 1000 hours which means around 2-3 hours a week. What would that be? What would you make your self a maestro in?

Okay, let us take a look at my example. It is still clear in my mind that I was a struggling student in my primary school. When I was in 3rd grade or so my mark was just depressing. My teachers would label me as one of those slow learners. At the end of my 6th Grade my sister passed me a book which called Quantum Learning. This book basically talks about a new way of learning. A more fun way of learning. With its colorful and interesting mindmapping, a way to take notes by drawing symbols and branches in a piece of paper. A fun way of mnemmonics to memorise and a philosophy that learning is a real fun process. I started to indulge my self in studying which not anymore seems to be painful. I started to read every kind of book possible I spent 3 hours or more everyday studying and reading. At the end of my junior high school I was one of the best graduate that led me to end up in one of the best high school in the country. I then studied many different things and continued in my 3 hours of learning ritual. Thus I have spent 8,000 hours of learning at the end of my 6 hours of high school from junior to senior. I obtained a full scholarship in one of the best university in Asia pacific and was able to do many things that stimulateds my intellect. I was an outlier, I was the 1 percent of my country's graduate who was able to get this scholarship. I was lucky. Was I? Yes I was in a way that I had the opportunity to read this book from my sister which led me to series of event that had led me to where I am now.

I am totally convinced that the law of 10,000 hours is a powerful tool in developing mastery. The greatest singer with the most profound technique started singing since they were 4 or 5 which means by the time they are in their 20s they have had their shares of 10,000 hours which shaped them to a singing sensation.

Or just look around you. Look around to the living outliers in your neighborhood. They have had their 10,000 hours.

I cant sleep

Because my worries keep me awake and my fear of dream resent me. I am trapped in between my residual daydreams and hopes of the far distant days laid in front of me. Seeking for the rainbows end amidst the dark blue sky with barely few stars just above me. I can hardly see the wagon-my star.
I tried to get busy with news of celebrities and the famous. Still, the night keeps falling and I am awake. I miss the good old days albeit my understanding that today will be one of the good old days of the days long after today. And I will never appreciate today but wishing that I can go back to the good old days that was not the good days because it was not old.
I want to race and prove my self to the establishment that is built before me. I can not sleep. My thoughts wandering and just keeps me a company with confusion and agitation. I can not sleep. O wait, is it the bird I heard from outside? O well, I can see the sun rises. Gosh, I am awake the whole night. I can not sleep.

Change

It is incredible how things changed or developed in the last five years. Incredible!

Quite a few years back I remembered vividly how I practically had a totally different interest and views of many things. This includes the world and the people. Honestly I am not quite sure where I am going with this. At times you tend to have this thing (ideas) stuck in your head that may be in the form of a sentence or some sentences that itches you to express it or them. This time around it has been that sentence (in italic).
I was sitting on the train today on my way back from Paris and reading this book entitled "Outliers" by Malcolm Galdwell.

An outlying observation, or outlier, is one that appears to deviate markedly from other members of the sample in which it occurs.

The Present

I wish I could live in the moment. How nice it would be if I can just live in the present without worrying too much about the future and regretting the past. How philosophically appealing this concept maybe which many have literally taken it so seriously as adapting them in to the lifestyle of no-plan and no-worries. There is no exact present. What there is is the constant flowing stream of event that just keeps flowing. In order to live in that very present and even that is a poorly defined condition. What is present? Today, This minute, This Second, This Milisecond... and it continues. Remember in today we have 24 hours which each of it contains 60 second in which each has 1000 milisecond. So how do we exactly live for the present if we do not even know or locate the present. We just trapped between a very narrow gap or infinitely narrow gap between past and future. As past is described as something that happened before right now and future as something after. In mathematics we understand the concept of limit or something that is infinitely large or something that is infinitely small. If we take a variable x and inverse and put in the largest possible positive real number we will have the result of the inverse as the smallest possible positive real number close to zero (But not zero). This is the very concept that we can adapt to describe "present". An infinitely small gap between the future and the past. But how small is small? Can we quantify it? Just like the illustration of the inverse of an infinitely large positive real number which is infinitely small value that is very very very small but not smaller than zero. If we can not quantify it, it does not mean we can not define it. Thanks to Mathematics and Limit. However this unquantifyable entity builts up a series of the event that happened before that very small gap and continues to build side by side to the future.

2 days Impression on Germany

Okay, perhaps I should be more specific: impression on Frankfurt, Wiesbaden and Wispertal.
Frankfurt is the capital of commerce of Germany situated in the federal state of Hesse. Frankfurt was practically flattened out during the second world war which shows from its (relatively) lacking-of-borjuis-style architecture that had been rampantly (in some parts) replaced by somewhat the so-called more modern style counterparts of architecture. A big euro building and the stock exchange are one of the few highlights in the financial department along with the old opera house in the more artsie fartsie department. Frankfurt is quite an international hub sheltering 40% of foreigners in its 700000 inhabitants. Heading West, Wiesbaden is the capital of Hesse where richer people live and reserved-heritage-of-old buildings are still existing. During the second world war the city was "lucky" enough to be considered (relatively) unimportant that it was not aggresively "flattened out" as the case of Frankfurt except for occasional missed-aim bombs which damaged relatively small parts of the city. It is a relatively rich residential area with facilities such as a Casino and century age old hotels.
Tomorrow I will be heading northwest to Paris.

PS: Pictures will be posted as soon as I arrive back in Zurich.

When the Sun is Out

Blue sky and it is time for bicycle riding feeling the warm breeze in the cool old town of Zurich.

I am in Frankfurt!!!!

Yeah. Finally, finally my internship came to an end (officially) this very Last Friday. The long due project had finally shown the expected result. In the mean time I am writing this blog from Frankfurt. Yea the capital of commerce of Germany.
The first impression is not so special or spectacular yet give me enough of a (good) break from Switzerland.

Sigh

Tired. Tired of attracting Dollar. Should I give up or should I persist?

You know this blog is meant to document my journey to being a multimillionaire.

First of all why not start being a millionaire?

Okay here is a thing. All that is in this universe constantly change some with fixed rate some with accelerated rate some with random rate. The classic example is the speed which is the rate of change of distance over time. Now, as profoundly put as this site is meant to be my tool kit to remind my self to go back to the very goal I have in mind the very day I set up this blog. Okay back to the question, we all know that it takes time to manifest what I have in my thought. Otherwise I would be somewhere in new york city right now with a penthouse and a private jet. Thus, it will take some time between the time I think of wanting multimillion dollar and the time when it really manifests. buffer time. In the mean time inflation keeps happening and the value of money keeps dropping. Thus if I say exactly one million dollar that I think one million dollar in the present time, by the time it manifest the one million dollar I receive will be no longer the one million dollar that I have in my mind then. Thus by saying multi million dollars the value is kept indefinitely millions....

Anyway the whole post is not going to talk about that. As the title suggests "sigh"-ing is more likely the way this post is written. if u care to know I am still stuck in the place that I currently have my internship and just getting a break from doing my documentation. Ahh and at the moment I am on the phone with a friend ..............................

ahhh anyway thanks for having decided to spare your time reading this...

no title

Have you ever felt low and demoralized without having any particular reason. That exactly how I have been feeling lately. Somehow you are demoralized of the uncertain future that at times shed by cloudy days. I was once thinking that I might be suffering from bipolar. It is due to the fact that I feel like being a ping pong ball bounces between the two extreme poles of feeling. It does not necessarily mean I have been triggered or such. I just feel helpless and totally irrational about it. I am not sure if many people have this although (if this is the case of bipolar) many have documented scientific research done on that. It is not harmful yet it is no fun to have one.

A friend of mine asked me why I spent too much time and energy to make myself feel down. Why not channel the energy somewhere else? I do not know nor do I have any ideas. I just feel that way and when the feeling somehow made to feel certain way I can not force it to instead feel another way. It is like being traped in a room placed in the middle of a gigantic spring with fixed ends. I just goes up and down or swing left and right without having any power to stop it. I would more than happy if I know how to channel my energy and to switch that buttong that control the way I should feel.

O gosh, it is so hard to be positive. It is even harder to know that it is not helping to be un-positive and thus I TRY to be positive. The thing is the more I try to be positive the more I seem to crack and feel down again. It is like a cycle.

I am not trying to be negative or anything I just try to stop to go against what I feel naturally. By naturally I mean I did not create the feeling they just there.

SATISFIED

What is satisfied?

Europe Conquered

Have I?

This very statement tickled me when, yesterday afternoon, I met a two-years encounter in Zurich. An American with whom by chance I crossed path in Singapore. Since the very first meeting we have on and off keep contact and update on each other life.

8 hours time zone different we met in other continent intentionally and the first thing that came into the conversation was:

"Wow, look at you! You have conquered Europe!"

However sarcastic is the nature of the above exclamation, I genuinely and hardly pray that some day the nature will shift to a no-longer sarcasm but rather a more genuine compliment.

Tips on Being a 20 something year old

First of all I belong to this group and thus have a hands-on experience of being a 20 something year old. This year I will turn 22 in October. Second of all being a 20 something year old is a lot of fun and a lot of crap at the same time which makes being a 20 syo (something year old) very tricky. Third of all with all being said I believe I have acquired a few skills and a bit of knowledge to handle being a 20 syo thus what I think absolutely matter.



Okay, if you belong to the group, the 20 syo, this entry is for you otherwise this can be a guide note for those who has yet to join this group or a flashback reference for those who were in the group.



Right.



It depends where you live when you are just to enter 20 syo which means you are at the edge of your teen years most probably you are in the college or going to a college. In some countries if you are a male you might be serving your country right now in the millitary or perhaps due to preference instead of going to college you probably are an internee. Higher chance is you are soooooooooooooooooo rich that right now you are reading this blog from your holiday in Maldives.



Okay here are the tips.



Tips number 1.



Feel comfortable at where ever place you are. If you are the biggest nerd on the planet then be it and feel comfortable and OWN it. If you are the dumbass pretty girl with high pitchy voice whose only talent is singing along the Taylor Swift song then be happy with it. Trust me my dear and I am speaking from experience, being a 20 yso is just a continuation from your teen years when you are looking for identity or doing your soul searching. Only difference is you think you are an adult. Yes you are NOT (most of you at least). Thus where ever your place is, that insecurity will haunt you! Some more frequent than others. Lots of us deal with this insecurities by having that attitude as a cover up while some others deal with it in silence while commiting self-cutting ritual.



Tips number 2.



Stop acting or being dillusional that you are an adult. Are you? Okay unless you are able to afford your own holiday and have your own house and able to do whatever you want. Especially those who are in the beginning of their membership in the 20 syo club, who rampantly just started a career or still in college. Most likely you still live with your parents, share appartment with fellow students, live in a dormitory or such and such. Where you are bound to certain rules and authorities. Once you have the illusion of being an adult that is exactly when you started to act freely and most of the time conflict with some rules that you may consider "silly". Instead, do the middle way approach. You are not an adult yet no longer a Kid. Try to understand the rules or the authority let your self be heard (and you will be when you have your head in the right place) and discuss what you need and the kind of freedom and area in the rules where you may manuever and be compensated.



Tips number 3.



Fall in Love: with an inspiring person. Falling in love is a great thing and one of the thing that looks nice with youth. But that other half better give you that feel good vibe that is able to propel you forward in the direction YOU desire.

Tips number 4.

Stop trying so hard in being different. As much as you are different from that guy with long dyed hair and piercing all over his body just as similar you are to him as thinking or wanting to be different. When everybody else wants to be different then it is no longer different to be different.

SICK OF THIS POSITIVITY

Not exactly. What I mean is a fake positivity. Although I agree and perhaps so do you that it is nicer feeling to be positive. Imagine the last time when even the cloudiest day felt so warm and joyful and you just could not help yourself but feeling happy.

However that feeling of happiness which naturally breezes to our soul once in a while will not stay there forever. I am not sure if I should reason this but here is a thing: we live in the world of constant CHANGE, Ups and Downs, Yin and Yang, Good and Bad, and the list goes on. We live in the world of relative where we need a standard scale to measure things in order to tell if something is shorter or longer, heavier or lighter, faster or slower. All of these qualities are relative so is good and bad.

That being said, I agree that we should go the longest distance or reach the highest star or go the deepest ocean in the search of that one thing to perhaps make us feel accomplished. I would not say happy. Now I seem to start to contradict my self. I believe in the different poles that life has as much as I believe us human being have the capability to make options available for us and choose what ever our heart may.

Along the way we may feel dissapointed or failed. This is the time when we should not be putting a fake smile and tried to look at a brighter side. When it sucks it sucks. Example: I am still to date have not gotten my one million dollars while I am getting relatively older. Cry the loudest when you need to or slam all the doors when you are angry. Nothing wrong with it. Really nothing wrong.

The society we live in enforce and endorse the campaign to fake our feeling in books and seminars which I had consumed during my early teen years. BUT trust me my friend once in a while you fail and the dark clouds are hanging over you. Your relationship failed, you bumped into a rocky mountain. Then cry take a step back cry but do not whine. Cry when you need to cry. Until the next positive breeze enter your soul again and that you are ready for a new start.

Being Happy

Why do we need to feel happy?
Other than the fact that being happy or feeling happy keeps you young also being happy apparently makes you a better person. Who the hell loves the company of a nagging person who complain nothing but simply everything.

However shall it be enforced?

I am in Love

And it feels good.

Friendship with God

Lately I have been reading a book by an author whose name I can not recall at the moment which titled Friendship with God. Although I have not finished the book I have the urge to at least talk about this book and how does it relate to my conclusion described in the above paragraph.

The book started with narration of the childhood of the author which was what could be described as religious-being born in to a catholic family--a strong catholic family. Despite that the author had always been a critical boy who dared questions on behalf of his common sense certain practices or principel in his, then, religion. Albeit his total devotion as an innocent catholic boy serving his God with fear of eternal condemnation had he done otherwise.

Time passes and he found himself an adult struggling with his life: Relationship which did not work out, health issues, professional issues and so on. One day he jolted down his frustration to writing letter to God. Surprisingly his letter was replied by the very God he intended to send the letter to. And that was how the conversation started.

The book basically talks about God's dissapointment for humankind has been treating him like a parent who is feared by his children. God with rules and regulation God who is selfish and angry who demands certain practices and certain way in order to find the path to Him and all these personifications that humankind has been posted and pasted unto Him. Which apparently is not true-according to the author of the book who claimed the very word was spoken unto him by the God in the very sense of the word. Instead God is a loving and forgiving magnificence whose blessings never end to humankind. The book also touched the sensitive area of judgement day which the book claimed not exist.

The book also talked about the realm or relative and the realm of absolute. In the world of absolute everything is absolute and there is nothing which is not. Everything is absolute and everything is one. There is no ego or separation or entity or boundary everything is simply one and absolute. The God created the world of relative (the world that you and me are living right now) such that we are able to experience the world of absolute. This is the concept of afterlife that the God with whom the author claimed he had had a conversation.

In order to have a friendship with God one needs to understand and know him self first. Because we are part of God and god is part of us as all is one in the realm of absolute. There is no separation, boundaries or entity. Everything is just one.

I am not sure nor am I interested in investigating either God really had talked to the author. Because either way I believe that I continue to have my own concept of the Creator inspite of the fanatism exhibited in the name of religion is pretty rampant-at least in many part of the world. I spent years and years of guilt for not compelling to a few rules which are set for me to follow. Here is a thing I believe in the common sense rules such as not killing your fellow human beings or giving to the poor or not stealing or stuffs like that. But when the rules get a little bit detail and minute to the extent that it dictates how someone should live their life. It may, for me, get a little pushy. Also it seems that many religion with the God that has been personified in the very devine books seems to be more interested in sharing the truth of their own version. The very true path to the only one God which only has one true path. And in order to achieve it one needs to be a member of one group. By the way the way that this book is written seems to be very local and tailor made for us Human being who happen to inhabit one of the planet in one of the galaxy in this vast vast vast universe. Are we that important?

Religiolous

I have no more excitement. For sure much less from that I used to have say five years ago or so. Instead of one or two or a handful of a few things on which I should be investing more time and effort such that to develop new talents or new knowledge, I seem to scatter around and to be caught between many and different interests.

Lately I have been asking my self a very vague yet profound question provoking a whole week of self reflection or self thought process. It is the very basis and one of the strongest and most sensitive attribute to a human being living in most part of the world. Religion.

First and foremost I am not going to ask the existence of God. Not because I am 100% sure for the existence nor due to the fact that I have solid fact stating otherwise. It is because of the fact that I am unable to provide certainty supporting neither side of the argument.

Although the terror of childhood story of hell and the torment mankind may receive due to the wrong doing which mainly mean the wrong doers are those who do not execute what the Creator wants them to execute. Not to mention the detail specific kind of action the mankind expected to execute such as a certain way of dressing, going to a particular place on a certain day/days, abstain from eating certain type of meat or from eating at all in a particular month, and so on. These rituals that are seem to be so important even more than the more sensible ones such as loving each other, help the poor, live your dreams and so on but instead these minute details that determine the kind of accommodation one will receive in the after life. I must admit at times these haunt me. Thus, I do those that I am expected to execute.

Would not you think that it is superficial? That we do all these things not out of freewill but instead of out of fear. Who created this fear?

Such superficiality that was accentuated by Kathy Griffin in her Emmy acceptance speech. Where she said:

Now, a lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. He didn't help me a bit. If it was up to him, Cesar Millan would be up here with that damn dog. So all I can say is suck it, Jesus, this award is my god now!

This remark apparently made a headline and brought such controversial publicity to Miss Griffin back in 2007. Although she was trying to convey the message that the superficial shallow people who tought themselves as the centre of the universe such that God partakes and participate in helping this people getting an award or making some billion dollars from a movie premiere. As if God had nothing else or more important stuffs to deal with.

Another thing that I dealt in again was this comedy and political documentary by the director Larry Charies en titled "Religioulous" which the word is derived from the word "Religion" and "Ridiculous". The documentary features interview with people from organized religious group or believe system by Bill Mahem who also gives remark and narration in the video. It was funny but smart. Provocative but probable.

I must admit my attitude towards religion or having one religion has developed to another level these past few years. It is the experience of meeting different type of people with different cultural approach to this topic and different attitude regarding religion. I am not sure and do not care if it is a better attitude or worse to the topic. Although from personal experience and personal observation my conclusion is religion may hinder someone from reaching its true potential or lead someone to self hate or self repression due to some fact that is not approved in the religious rules and law which can not be changed. Example: Being a homosexual.

My Affirmation of The Day:

I want to LIVE in Zurich :D

Reasons :

1. High Standard of living
2. Subtle or close to no Racism environment
3. Open to international people
4. English is spoken by many people
5. A beautiful city
6. One of the greenest and cleanest city in the world
7. At the centre of Europe
and the list goes on..

First Sun in May in Zurich

After weeks of cold and rain the Sun has appeared form Her shelter. Everyone comes out enjoy the warmth and the company of each other.
Father and Son playing soccer, youngsters gather and laugh, old couples strolling slowly in the park.